Mudder is over. I have a NEW focus, and it’s sort of fun these past few weeks.
I focused on losing or making myself less for a long ass time. Blech. I’m even sick of talking about it I’ve written about it so much. It was sad days then. Like, shit, can I eat that? Should I eat that? I want to eat that but can’t eat that. So I don’t eat that, so I’ll think about it all week, and then eat it x 60 at some point on the weekend, feel like shitty ick about myself, rinse, and repeat. Oh, and I will still keep my workouts on point. Oh, and that x 60 binge? Yep, I’ll pay penance for that in a workout.
Not the way to go folks.
If you find yourself in that no fun cycle, get off that ride immediately.
I got off that ride, and it has helped me so much. Anyway, I’m off topic.
Mudder’s over. Time to build…….
I’m building my ability to do MORE.
I’m building my kettlebell skillz.
I’m building my kettlebell endurance.
I’m building my self-discipline with really intentional workouts.
I’m building my awareness of my body and what needs help and what’s smooth sailing, and I’m RESPECTING what it tells me.
I’m building my strength.
I’m building my muscles.
I’m building my ability to get comfortable with being uncomfortable…..without having freak outs.
You know what’s really awesome?
There is not ONE thing in my list that has to do with “less.” Like, less food, or getting smaller, or being on a diet, or any of that crazy.
You know what else? I’m on SUCH a good level with food. Because I’m not comparing to what I used to be, or what so and so looks like. I’m not trying to get smaller. I’m actually happily NAILING “moderation.” Who am I?
I will share a tiny little bit of my shift in thinking here.
When I actually sat down with a quiet mind and thought about what I actually WANTED, I realized something. I WANT to get balls strong with my kettlebell game. I want to get that RKC. I want to really build my kettlebell skills and get super-duper strong and learn how to respect my body and not over train. I want to eat the most I can, and do the least amount of work I can in the gym, while having fun, enjoying my workouts, being on a great relationship with food, and having a healthy body that moves well and without pain or limitation, and still maintain or BUILD where I’m at….
I’ve wanted those things for a long, long, long time.
BUT I TRAINED FOR FAT LOSS AND ATE LIKE MY GOAL WAS FAT LOSS.
Do you see the problem? I was performing to be “less” when I really wanted to be “more.” Major disconnect!
But when I started training like I was on the “more” train, and actually started eating like I was on the “more” train……uh….I started killing my workouts. And I’m looking forward to them! I’ve written my own training plan (hopefully it’s legit), and as I’m going through it, I’m tweaking things as needed. I have a four (five if I have the energy/recovery dialed in) training day schedule every 6-9 days…depending on what kind of work I get in instructing class and personal training sessions. My other considerations that determine my training frequency are overall energy levels, stress, sleep and if my body just needs to move or just needs a break.
How does this relate to you?
Well, maybe it doesn’t, and that’s ok. Or, maybe you have found yourself in this rat race of trying to lose the last couple pounds, or trying to lean up, or trying to fit into a certain pair of jeans for awhile, or for a class reunion, or whatevs. If this describes you, maybe it’s time to NOT focus on the “less” part for awhile. Maybe it’s time to focus on building your skills, your strength, your mobility, your endurance, or whatever it is that you are after, and drop “less” to the wayside.
What I’d encourage you to do (and I can’t believe it’s taken me THIS long to do this, even after all I preach about on my little bloggy blog), is take a bit and sit quietly and actually think about what you WANT. Or even take a week or so to reflect on what you want. Like, what you REALLY want, not what sounds cool, or looks cool, or your friends are doing, or what your spouse wants you to do….but what YOU want to do. Then, spend some more time reflecting on what you are doing right now, or what you have been doing as you think you are going after what you want. Do what you want and what you are doing match up? If not, there’s your disconnect….make both match. If they do match up….BOOM, you have hit your sweet spot!
Sometimes, taking time to pause and reflect and not RUSH things are so vital. Things can get emotional sometimes, and those emotions can tend to cast a shadow over things in a way that don’t allow you to see that what you do competes with what you want to do. Try sitting back and reflecting for a bit, and figure out WHERE YOU WANT TO GO (Point B), and where you are (Point A), and then make the path from A to B and make sure your daily habits align. This is true for nearly anything in life, not just food or fitness. It’s so simple, but definitely not always easy.